{"product_id":"meetings-that-could-have-been-an-email-funny-retirement-card","title":"Meetings That Could Have Been An Email — Funny Retirement Card","description":"\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003eFor the person finally escaping the calendar invites for good.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\"Congrats on your retirement \u0026amp; surviving years of meetings that could have been an email.\"\u003c\/strong\u003e Nobody who survived a decade of pointless standups wants a sappy send-off. They want the truth, delivered with a wink.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003eFor the retiring coworker, the boss who's done their time, the office legend riding off into a life with zero \"quick syncs.\" It says exactly what the whole team is thinking.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003eNo more status updates. No more agendas. Just freedom.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul class=\"[li_\u0026amp;]:mb-0 [li_\u0026amp;]:mt-1 [li_\u0026amp;]:gap-1 [\u0026amp;:not(:last-child)_ul]:pb-1 [\u0026amp;:not(:last-child)_ol]:pb-1 list-disc flex flex-col gap-1 pl-8 mb-3\"\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"font-claude-response-body whitespace-normal break-words pl-2\"\u003eA2 folded card, blank inside for your own words\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"font-claude-response-body whitespace-normal break-words pl-2\"\u003eKraft envelope + protective cello sleeve\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli class=\"font-claude-response-body whitespace-normal break-words pl-2\"\u003ePrinted on quality cardstock\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"As Told By Ellie","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":43763519651914,"sku":"YAY002","price":5.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0549\/5871\/9050\/files\/YAY002.jpg?v=1782871944","url":"https:\/\/www.astoldbyellie.com\/products\/meetings-that-could-have-been-an-email-funny-retirement-card","provider":"As Told By Ellie","version":"1.0","type":"link"}