{"title":"Cards for Your Best Friend","description":"\u003cp\u003eFunny cards for your best friend, the person who knows everything and stays anyway. Birthday cards, friendship cards, and cards that say the unhinged thing out loud. Sending one is basically a love language.\u003c\/p\u003e","products":[{"product_id":"happy-birthday-you-beautiful-bitch-card","title":"Funny Birthday Card for Best Friend — Happy Birthday Beautiful Bitch A2 Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eFor your best friend, your ride or die, the person who has seen you at your worst and stayed anyway. This is the birthday card that says I love you and also I'm not going to be nice about it. She'll know exactly what you mean.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCard Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSize: A2 (4.25\" x 5.5\")\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eInside: Blank\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes a complimentary kraft envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes our world famous “Rip Open This Mofo” sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShipped in a rigid mailer to keep your card pristine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShips USPS Ground Advantage — upgrade available at checkout\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"As Told By Ellie","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":39570584633418,"sku":"BIR001","price":5.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0549\/5871\/9050\/files\/ChatGPTImageMay20_2026_11_15_05AM.png?v=1779293749"},{"product_id":"happy-birthday-bitch-card-1","title":"Funny Birthday Card for Best Friend — Happy Birthday Bitch A2 Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe Beautiful Bitch card needed a sister. Here she is. For the best friend who would absolutely send you the same thing and think it was a compliment -- because it is. This is how your friendship works and everyone around you just has to deal with it.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCard Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSize: A2 (4.25\" x 5.5\")\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eInside: Blank\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes a complimentary kraft envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes our world famous “Rip Open This Mofo” sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShipped in a rigid mailer to keep your card pristine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShips USPS Ground Advantage — upgrade available at checkout\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"As Told By Ellie","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":39572446183498,"sku":"BIR002","price":5.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0549\/5871\/9050\/files\/ChatGPTImageMay20_2026_11_10_21AM.png?v=1779463190"},{"product_id":"happy-halloween-you-spooky-bitch-card-1","title":"Funny Halloween Card for Best Friend — Happy Halloween You Spooky Bitch A2 Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eFor your favorite witch this spooky season. Whether she's your best friend, your sister, or the coworker you actually like, this card says exactly what you think of her and she's going to love it.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCard Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSize: A2 (4.25\" x 5.5\")\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eInside: Blank\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes a complimentary kraft envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes our world famous “Rip Open This Mofo” sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShipped in a rigid mailer to keep your card pristine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShips USPS Ground Advantage — upgrade available at checkout\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"As Told By Ellie","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":39572553859146,"sku":"BOO002","price":5.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0549\/5871\/9050\/files\/BLANKS-2026-06-01T102103.437.jpg?v=1780327284"},{"product_id":"whore-card","title":"Funny Birthday Card for Friend — Whore A2 Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eSend it to a friend or a foe. No judgment here -- honestly no questions either. You know who this is for and why. The card says it all so you don't have to.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCard Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSize: A2 (4.25\" x 5.5\")\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eInside: Blank\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes a complimentary kraft envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes our world famous “Rip Open This Mofo” sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShipped in a rigid mailer to keep your card pristine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShips USPS Ground Advantage — upgrade available at checkout\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"As Told By Ellie","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":39670619930698,"sku":"FRD005","price":5.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0549\/5871\/9050\/files\/AIfaves_9_2adafd64-3fda-42d1-9c17-c8ff911be312.jpg?v=1780160756"},{"product_id":"happy-birthday-ya-cunt-card","title":"Funny Birthday Card for Best Friend — Happy Birthday Ya Cunt A2 Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eFor the friend who can handle it and honestly expects nothing less from you. You two have the kind of friendship where this card is a compliment and she knows it. She'd send you the same thing. That's the whole point.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCard Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSize: A2 (4.25\" x 5.5\")\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eInside: Blank\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes a complimentary kraft envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes our world famous “Rip Open This Mofo” sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShipped in a rigid mailer to keep your card pristine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShips USPS Ground Advantage — upgrade available at checkout\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"As Told By Ellie","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":39670620291146,"sku":"BIR014","price":5.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0549\/5871\/9050\/files\/BLANKS-2026-05-23T094711.022.jpg?v=1779547649"},{"product_id":"youre-the-shit-card-funny-card-for-friend-birthday-card-for-best-friend","title":"Funny Friendship Card — You're the Shit A2 Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eFor the person in your life who is just genuinely the shit. Works for birthdays, just because, thank yous, or literally any occasion where you want them to know they're appreciated. Pairs perfectly with literally any gift -- or ships alone in a rigid mailer and makes a statement all on its own.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCard Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSize: A2 (4.25\" x 5.5\")\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eInside: Blank\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes a complimentary kraft envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes our world famous “Rip Open This Mofo” sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShipped in a rigid mailer to keep your card pristine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShips USPS Ground Advantage — upgrade available at checkout\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"As Told By Ellie","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":39833073451082,"sku":"FRD013","price":5.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0549\/5871\/9050\/files\/IMG-2640.png?v=1779892849"},{"product_id":"happy-fucking-birthday-card-birthday-card-for-best-friend-retro-birthday-card-funny","title":"Funny Retro Birthday Card — Happy Fucking Birthday A2 Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eFor your bestie who deserves the whole word spelled out on their birthday. Bold retro typography, everyone's favorite F word, and zero apologies. This is the birthday card for the friend who would roll their eyes at anything sentimental and loves you more for knowing that.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCard Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSize: A2 (4.25\" x 5.5\")\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eInside: Blank\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes a complimentary kraft envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes our world famous “Rip Open This Mofo” sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShipped in a rigid mailer to keep your card pristine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShips USPS Ground Advantage — upgrade available at checkout\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"As Told By Ellie","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":39833073680458,"sku":"BIR022","price":5.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0549\/5871\/9050\/files\/BLANKS_37.jpg?v=1779469635"},{"product_id":"youre-my-favorite-person-card-funny-friendship-card-everyone-else-can-eat-a-bag-of-dicks","title":"Funny Friendship Card — You're My Favorite Person Everyone Else Can Eat a Bag of Dicks A2 Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eFor your absolute favorite person. The one you'd never say this to out loud in a public setting because it's a lot, but who fully deserves to hear it. A floral card with a very specific level of appreciation for the person who makes everyone else tolerable by existing.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCard Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSize: A2 (4.25\" x 5.5\")\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eInside: Blank\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes a complimentary kraft envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes our world famous “Rip Open This Mofo” sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShipped in a rigid mailer to keep your card pristine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShips USPS Ground Advantage — upgrade available at checkout\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"As Told By Ellie","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":39929795149898,"sku":"FRD016","price":5.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0549\/5871\/9050\/files\/AIfaves_13_20b70251-c5e1-4a63-87e3-ca2b0c80aa4e.jpg?v=1780161965"},{"product_id":"ho-ho-ho-you-lil-ho-christmas-card-funny-christmas-card-christmas-card-for-best-friend","title":"Funny Christmas Card for Best Friend — Ho Ho Ho You Lil Ho A2 Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eJust because it's Christmas doesn't mean you can't call someone a ho.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCard Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSize: A2 (4.25\" x 5.5\")\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eInside: Blank\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes a complimentary kraft envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes our world famous “Rip Open This Mofo” sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShipped in a rigid mailer to keep your card pristine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShips USPS Ground Advantage — upgrade available at checkout\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"As Told By Ellie","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40270490959946,"sku":"XMS020","price":5.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0549\/5871\/9050\/products\/il_fullxfull.4286359297_qtho.jpg?v=1721924883"},{"product_id":"another-year-older-still-a-badass-bitch-card-birthday-card-for-best-friend-funny-birthday-card","title":"Funny Birthday Card for Her — Another Year Older Badass Bitch A2 Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eFor the friend who gets better with age and absolutely knows it. She doesn't need you to tell her -- but she likes that you did. This birthday card says happy birthday and also you're incredible and I'm glad you exist, just in the way that doesn't make either of you cry.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCard Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSize: A2 (4.25\" x 5.5\")\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eInside: Blank\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes a complimentary kraft envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes our world famous “Rip Open This Mofo” sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShipped in a rigid mailer to keep your card pristine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShips USPS Ground Advantage — upgrade available at checkout\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"As Told By Ellie","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":39929796264010,"sku":"BIR025","price":5.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0549\/5871\/9050\/files\/ChatGPTImageMay20_2026_11_07_14AM.png?v=1779463268"},{"product_id":"galentines-card-galentines-day-gifts","title":"Funny Galentine's Day Card — Happy Galentine's Day Bitch A2 Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eCelebrate your bestie this Galentine's Day with a card that's as sassy and fabulous as she is. For the friend who deserves her own holiday and a card that says exactly what she is -- which is a bitch, and you mean that as the highest possible compliment.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCard Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSize: A2 (4.25\" x 5.5\")\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eInside: Blank\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes a complimentary kraft envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes our world famous “Rip Open This Mofo” sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShipped in a rigid mailer to keep your card pristine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShips USPS Ground Advantage — upgrade available at checkout\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"As Told By Ellie","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40206468350026,"sku":"LUV024","price":5.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0549\/5871\/9050\/files\/Untitleddesign_10.png?v=1747843701"},{"product_id":"i-love-you-card-funny-card-for-best-friend-just-because-card","title":"Funny Love Card — I Fucking Love You A2 Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eAny occasion. For a lover or a best friend. This card says the thing you mean with America's favorite F word and zero apologies. Send it on Valentine's Day, their birthday, a Tuesday, or literally any day you want the most important person in your life to know they are exactly that.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCard Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSize: A2 (4.25\" x 5.5\")\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eInside: Blank\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes a complimentary kraft envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes our world famous “Rip Open This Mofo” sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShipped in a rigid mailer to keep your card pristine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShips USPS Ground Advantage — upgrade available at checkout\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"As Told By Ellie","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40206472151114,"sku":"LUV009","price":5.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0549\/5871\/9050\/files\/AIfaves_5_cfd03dc1-3ca1-47e2-b6ae-622721b4a791.jpg?v=1780160640"},{"product_id":"best-friend-birthday-card-funny-birthday-card-for-her-funny-friend-birthday-card-sister-birthday-card-birthday-card-for-sister","title":"Funny Birthday Card for Best Friend — Happy Birthday and Shit A2 Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eCute ombre vibes, 100% sassy energy, and absolutely zero filter. This is the birthday card for the best friend who would much rather get something funny than something heartfelt -- and knows that funny IS heartfelt when it comes from you.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCard Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSize: A2 (4.25\" x 5.5\")\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eInside: Blank\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes a complimentary kraft envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes our world famous “Rip Open This Mofo” sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShipped in a rigid mailer to keep your card pristine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShips USPS Ground Advantage — upgrade available at checkout\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"As Told By Ellie","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40206472314954,"sku":"BIR013","price":5.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0549\/5871\/9050\/files\/ChatGPTImageMay20_2026_11_08_53AM.png?v=1779293374"},{"product_id":"happy-birthday-legend","title":"Funny Birthday Card for Him or Her — Happy Birthday Legend A2 Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eFor the absolute legend in your life who deserves to be told exactly that. No ambiguity, no fluff, no sappy poem -- just a direct statement of fact on their birthday. They're a legend and you want them to know it. This is that card.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCard Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSize: A2 (4.25\" x 5.5\")\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eInside: Blank\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes a complimentary kraft envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes our world famous “Rip Open This Mofo” sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShipped in a rigid mailer to keep your card pristine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShips USPS Ground Advantage — upgrade available at checkout\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"As Told By Ellie","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40310256959562,"sku":"BIR024","price":5.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0549\/5871\/9050\/files\/AIBLANKCARDS_4.jpg?v=1779461015"},{"product_id":"happy-birthday-beautiful-bitch-floral-card","title":"Funny Birthday Card for Best Friend — Happy Birthday You Beautiful Bitch Floral A2 Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eTell your best bitch exactly what she is on her birthday. Floral, vibrant, unapologetically sweary, and genuinely meant with love. This is the card for the friend who knows a compliment when she sees one -- and this is definitely a compliment.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCard Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSize: A2 (4.25\" x 5.5\")\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eInside: Blank\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes a complimentary kraft envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes our world famous “Rip Open This Mofo” sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShipped in a rigid mailer to keep your card pristine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShips USPS Ground Advantage — upgrade available at checkout\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"As Told By Ellie","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40326340477002,"sku":"BIR074","price":5.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0549\/5871\/9050\/files\/BLANKS_49.jpg?v=1779473081"},{"product_id":"happy-birthday-to-a-badass-bitch-card","title":"Funny Birthday Card for Her — Happy Birthday to a Badass Bitch A2 Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eShe is a badass bitch and her birthday is the perfect occasion to put it in writing. For the woman in your life who would cringe at something sentimental but will absolutely keep this card. She knows what it means. That's exactly why you're sending it.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCard Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSize: A2 (4.25\" x 5.5\")\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eInside: Blank\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes a complimentary kraft envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes our world famous “Rip Open This Mofo” sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShipped in a rigid mailer to keep your card pristine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShips USPS Ground Advantage — upgrade available at checkout\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"As Told By Ellie","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40330913972298,"sku":"BIR070","price":5.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0549\/5871\/9050\/files\/IMG-2646.png?v=1779306086"},{"product_id":"happy-birthday-bestie","title":"Funny Birthday Card for Best Friend — Happy Birthday to My Fucking Bestie A2 Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eFor your fucking bestie on their birthday. Because that's what they are and they deserve to know it -- spelled out, in writing, with a card that matches the energy of your entire friendship. No subtlety. Just love.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCard Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSize: A2 (4.25\" x 5.5\")\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eInside: Blank\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes a complimentary kraft envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes our world famous “Rip Open This Mofo” sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShipped in a rigid mailer to keep your card pristine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShips USPS Ground Advantage — upgrade available at checkout\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"As Told By Ellie","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40331333828682,"sku":"BIR067","price":5.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0549\/5871\/9050\/files\/IMG-2635.png?v=1779305729"},{"product_id":"thanks-bitch-card","title":"Funny Thank You Card — Thanks Bitch A2 Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eTwo birds, one card. Thank them AND keep them humble. This is the thank you card for the person who would cringe at something sentimental but absolutely needs to be told they're appreciated. Ships flat in a rigid mailer so it arrives perfectly -- which is more than they can say for some of the favors they've done for you.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCard Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSize: A2 (4.25\" x 5.5\")\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eInside: Blank\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes a complimentary kraft envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes our world famous “Rip Open This Mofo” sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShipped in a rigid mailer to keep your card pristine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShips USPS Ground Advantage — upgrade available at checkout\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"As Told By Ellie","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40373155594314,"sku":"THX015","price":5.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0549\/5871\/9050\/files\/BLANKS-2026-06-01T092211.262.jpg?v=1780323755"},{"product_id":"happy-birthday-ho-bag-snarky-card","title":"Funny Birthday Card for Bestie — Happy Birthday Ho Bag A2 Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eFor the friend who's a little bit of a ho and absolutely loves it about herself. The bestie, the wife, the sister, the girlfriend who would frame this card and put it on her desk. Wishing her a happy birthday while also lovingly calling her a ho bag is the most accurate way to celebrate her, and she knows it.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThis is the card for the group chat that has zero filter and even less shame. Send it to the friend who's already screenshotted this listing to her stories. The kraft envelope and Rip Open This Mofo sticker make it feel like an actual gift, not an afterthought.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCard Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSize: A2 (4.25\" x 5.5\")\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eInside: Blank for your own message\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes a complimentary kraft envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes our world famous \"Rip Open This Mofo\" sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShipped in a rigid mailer to keep your card pristine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShips USPS Ground Advantage — upgrade available at checkout\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"As Told By Ellie","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40422026707018,"sku":"BIR029","price":5.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0549\/5871\/9050\/files\/BLANKS_34.jpg?v=1779469203"},{"product_id":"i-hate-everyone-but-you-card","title":"Funny Friendship Card — I Hate Everyone But You A2 Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eIt be like that sometimes. For the one person on the planet who makes existing in the world genuinely tolerable. You don't say it to everyone -- you say it to them. This card is for that person. Send it on their birthday, Valentine's Day, or literally any day you want them to know.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCard Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSize: A2 (4.25\" x 5.5\")\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eInside: Blank\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes a complimentary kraft envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes our world famous “Rip Open This Mofo” sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShipped in a rigid mailer to keep your card pristine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShips USPS Ground Advantage — upgrade available at checkout\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"As Told By Ellie","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40434705530954,"sku":"FRD011","price":5.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0549\/5871\/9050\/files\/IMG-2656.png?v=1779307323"},{"product_id":"thanks-fucker-card","title":"Funny Thank You Card — Thanks Fucker A2 Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eGratitude with a side of humility -- exactly what they need. For the person who deserves to be thanked AND reminded not to let it go to their head. Ships flat in a rigid mailer because even a sarcastic thank you deserves to arrive looking great.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCard Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSize: A2 (4.25\" x 5.5\")\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eInside: Blank\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes a complimentary kraft envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes our world famous “Rip Open This Mofo” sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShipped in a rigid mailer to keep your card pristine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShips USPS Ground Advantage — upgrade available at checkout\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"As Told By Ellie","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40564349435978,"sku":"THX010","price":5.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0549\/5871\/9050\/files\/BLANKS-2026-06-01T100829.011.jpg?v=1780326579"},{"product_id":"unpaid-therapist-funny-thank-you-card","title":"Funny Thank You Card for Best Friend — Unpaid Therapist A2 Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eFor the friend who listens to everything and charges absolutely nothing. She knows every secret, talked you through every crisis, and never once sent you a bill for it. This card is the acknowledgment she deserves -- that you see what she does and you're grateful for every single session.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCard Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSize: A2 (4.25\" x 5.5\")\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eInside: Blank\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes a complimentary kraft envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes our world famous “Rip Open This Mofo” sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShipped in a rigid mailer to keep your card pristine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShips USPS Ground Advantage — upgrade available at checkout\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"As Told By Ellie","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":41405195157578,"sku":"THX001","price":5.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0549\/5871\/9050\/files\/IMG-2814.png?v=1779854070"},{"product_id":"lovely-bitch-galentines-day-card","title":"Naughty Valentine's Day Card — Lovely Bitch Happy Galentine's Day A2 Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eFor the lovely bitch in your life on Galentine's Day. Because your friendship deserves its own holiday and she deserves a card that says exactly what she is -- which is lovely, and also a bitch, and you mean both of those things as the highest compliment possible.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCard Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSize: A2 (4.25\" x 5.5\")\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eInside: Blank\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes a complimentary kraft envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes our world famous “Rip Open This Mofo” sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShipped in a rigid mailer to keep your card pristine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShips USPS Ground Advantage — upgrade available at checkout\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"As Told By Ellie","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":41828322213962,"sku":"LUV053","price":5.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0549\/5871\/9050\/files\/fancygreetingcardmockups_54.png?v=1735417585"},{"product_id":"so-fetch-birthday-card","title":"Funny Mean Girls Birthday Card — So Fetch A2 Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eYour bestie's birthday? That's so fetch. This pink ransom-note style card is for the friend who quotes Mean Girls with you, who got the reference immediately, and who would absolutely appreciate you sending this more than anything sentimental you could have found. You know who she is. This is her card.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCard Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSize: A2 (4.25\" x 5.5\")\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eInside: Blank\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes a complimentary kraft envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes our world famous “Rip Open This Mofo” sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShipped in a rigid mailer to keep your card pristine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShips USPS Ground Advantage — upgrade available at checkout\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"As Told By Ellie","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":41908604043338,"sku":"BIR027","price":5.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0549\/5871\/9050\/files\/BLANKS_16.jpg?v=1779465119"},{"product_id":"happy-birthday-bestie-card","title":"Funny Birthday Card for Best Friend — Happy Birthday Bestie A2 Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eBold, colorful, and full of actual love. For your bestie on her birthday -- the one who deserves a card that matches the energy of your friendship. Sign it. Send it. Let her know it's her day and you're glad she exists.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCard Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSize: A2 (4.25\" x 5.5\")\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eInside: Blank\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes a complimentary kraft envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes our world famous “Rip Open This Mofo” sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShipped in a rigid mailer to keep your card pristine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShips USPS Ground Advantage — upgrade available at checkout\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"As Told By Ellie","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":42041512427594,"sku":"BIR005","price":5.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0549\/5871\/9050\/files\/BLANKS_82.jpg?v=1779547044"},{"product_id":"happy-birthday-to-an-absolute-dumpster-fire-card","title":"Funny Birthday Card for Friend — Happy Birthday to an Absolute Dumpster Fire A2 Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eFor that glorious, chaotic friend who is a walking disaster in the absolute best way. The one who has three simultaneous crises and still shows up for you. The one whose life is a dumpster fire and she knows it and she owns it. Happy birthday to her. She deserves this card.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCard Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSize: A2 (4.25\" x 5.5\")\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eInside: Blank\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes a complimentary kraft envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes our world famous “Rip Open This Mofo” sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShipped in a rigid mailer to keep your card pristine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShips USPS Ground Advantage — upgrade available at checkout\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"As Told By Ellie","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":42124200542282,"sku":"BIR031","price":5.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0549\/5871\/9050\/files\/BLANKS-2026-05-23T105834.791.jpg?v=1779552523"},{"product_id":"boo-you-whore-ween-card","title":"Funny Halloween Card for Best Friend — Boo You Whore A2 Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eFor your favorite spooky troublemaker this Halloween. The friend who is a little bit witch energy year-round and fully commits to the season. This card says happy Halloween in the most accurate and affectionate way possible and she is going to love it.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCard Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSize: A2 (4.25\" x 5.5\")\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eInside: Blank\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes a complimentary kraft envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes our world famous “Rip Open This Mofo” sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShipped in a rigid mailer to keep your card pristine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShips USPS Ground Advantage — upgrade available at checkout\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"As Told By Ellie","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":42404583866442,"sku":"BOO001","price":5.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0549\/5871\/9050\/files\/BLANKS-2026-06-01T102002.776.jpg?v=1780327210"},{"product_id":"thanks-for-pretending-im-normal-friendship-card","title":"Funny Thank You Card — Thanks for Pretending I'm Normal A2 Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eBecause thank you for tolerating me didn't sound as cute. For the best friend, sister, or anyone who sticks around despite knowing everything and still chooses to show up. This card is for that person and they know exactly who they are.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCard Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSize: A2 (4.25\" x 5.5\")\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eInside: Blank\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes a complimentary kraft envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes our world famous “Rip Open This Mofo” sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShipped in a rigid mailer to keep your card pristine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShips USPS Ground Advantage — upgrade available at checkout\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"As Told By Ellie","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":42617759596618,"sku":"THX004","price":5.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0549\/5871\/9050\/files\/BLANKS-2026-06-01T101425.806.jpg?v=1780326881"},{"product_id":"beautiful-bitch-birthday-card","title":"Funny Birthday Card for Best Friend — Beautiful Bitch Floral A2 Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eFor your best friend, favorite cousin, or the chaotic coworker who has somehow become one of your people. This floral birthday card delivers high-impact beauty with unapologetic sass -- the exact combination that says I love you and I also have no filter and she wouldn't have it any other way.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCard Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSize: A2 (4.25\" x 5.5\")\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eInside: Blank\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes a complimentary kraft envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes our world famous “Rip Open This Mofo” sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShipped in a rigid mailer to keep your card pristine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShips USPS Ground Advantage — upgrade available at checkout\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"As Told By Ellie","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":42825809756234,"sku":"BIR028","price":5.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0549\/5871\/9050\/files\/BLANKS-2026-05-23T111409.770.jpg?v=1779552976"},{"product_id":"bestie-galentines-day-card","title":"Funny Galentine's Day Card — Happy Galentine's Day Bestie A2 Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eFor one of your girls on Galentine's Day. The friend who shows up, who knows everything, who is always on your side even when you're wrong, and who absolutely deserves their own holiday. Send this to her. Let her know her friendship has its own whole day now.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCard Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSize: A2 (4.25\" x 5.5\")\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eInside: Blank\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes a complimentary kraft envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes our world famous “Rip Open This Mofo” sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShipped in a rigid mailer to keep your card pristine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShips USPS Ground Advantage — upgrade available at checkout\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"As Told By Ellie","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":43145031483466,"sku":"LUV007","price":5.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0549\/5871\/9050\/files\/Copyofcardmockups_15.jpg?v=1765505928"},{"product_id":"feral-valentines-day-card","title":"Funny Feral Valentine's Day Card — It's Fine I'm Fine A2 Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eIt's fine. You're fine. Everything is fine. This Valentine's card is for the friend, partner, or person in your life who appreciates a card that is equal parts sarcastic and sincere -- the one who would see this and immediately text you seventeen laughing emojis and then actually feel seen by it.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCard Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSize: A2 (4.25\" x 5.5\")\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eInside: Blank\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes a complimentary kraft envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes our world famous “Rip Open This Mofo” sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShipped in a rigid mailer to keep your card pristine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShips USPS Ground Advantage — upgrade available at checkout\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"As Told By Ellie","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":43146452303946,"sku":"LUV008","price":5.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0549\/5871\/9050\/files\/Copyofcardmockups_1_7c8ad30c-6c67-407a-98d7-34595cf19fad.jpg?v=1767497367"},{"product_id":"favorite-weirdo-card-funny-friendship-card-cute-love-card-for-friends","title":"Funny Friendship Card — You're My Favorite Weirdo A2 Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eFor the person who gets all your weird jokes, your random 2am thoughts, your niche references, and your most unhinged opinions -- and not only keeps up but actively participates. You know who your favorite weirdo is. This card is for them.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCard Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSize: A2 (4.25\" x 5.5\")\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eInside: Blank\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes a complimentary kraft envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes our world famous “Rip Open This Mofo” sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShipped in a rigid mailer to keep your card pristine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShips USPS Ground Advantage — upgrade available at checkout\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"As Told By Ellie","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":43231817367626,"sku":"FRD019","price":5.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0549\/5871\/9050\/files\/IMG-2667.png?v=1779308501"}],"url":"https:\/\/www.astoldbyellie.com\/collections\/cards-for-your-best-friend.oembed?page=3","provider":"As Told By Ellie","version":"1.0","type":"link"}