{"title":"Cards for Coworkers","description":"\u003cp\u003eFunny cards for coworkers: farewells, promotions, birthdays, and \"the office group card but make it actually funny.\" HR-adjacent humor for the people you survive Mondays with.\u003c\/p\u003e","products":[{"product_id":"happy-retirement-fucking-quitter","title":"Funny Retirement Card — Happy Retirement You Fucking Quitter A2 Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eFor the coworker, boss, parent, or anyone in your life who just retired and earned every single day of it. They spent decades showing up and now they get to stop and they deserve a card that celebrates that with the energy it deserves. Ships in a rigid mailer so it arrives perfectly -- just like their career, but with a better ending.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCard Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSize: A2 (4.25\" x 5.5\")\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eInside: Blank\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes a complimentary kraft envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes our world famous “Rip Open This Mofo” sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShipped in a rigid mailer to keep your card pristine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShips USPS Ground Advantage — upgrade available at checkout\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"As Told By Ellie","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40423394377802,"sku":"YAY007","price":5.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0549\/5871\/9050\/files\/AIfaves-2026-05-26T215422.235.jpg?v=1779850473"},{"product_id":"congrats-on-your-new-job-you-fucking-traitor-card","title":"Funny New Job Card for Coworker — Congrats You Fucking Traitor A2 Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eIf you're lucky, you love your coworkers. But sometimes those assholes leave for bigger and better things. It's okay to guilt-trip them just a little on the way out. This card says congratulations and also how dare you and they need to receive both messages simultaneously.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCard Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSize: A2 (4.25\" x 5.5\")\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eInside: Blank\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes a complimentary kraft envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes our world famous “Rip Open This Mofo” sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShipped in a rigid mailer to keep your card pristine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShips USPS Ground Advantage — upgrade available at checkout\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"As Told By Ellie","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40479429394506,"sku":"YAY008","price":5.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0549\/5871\/9050\/files\/AIfaves_96.jpg?v=1779815244"},{"product_id":"merry-christmas-from-the-best-damn-employees-card","title":"Funny Christmas Card for Boss — Merry Christmas From Your Best Employees A2 Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eKeep it real with your boss this holiday season and remind them how wonderful it is to have such amazing employees. They already know but it doesn't hurt to put it in a card. Send it from the whole team or send it solo -- either way the message is clear and completely accurate.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCard Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSize: A2 (4.25\" x 5.5\")\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eInside: Blank\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes a complimentary kraft envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes our world famous “Rip Open This Mofo” sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShipped in a rigid mailer to keep your card pristine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShips USPS Ground Advantage — upgrade available at checkout\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"As Told By Ellie","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40544039010378,"sku":"XMS032","price":5.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0549\/5871\/9050\/files\/xms1_ebdf0c43-1c42-44f6-85e2-74189d585330.jpg?v=1700732764"},{"product_id":"coworker-leaving-gift","title":"Funny Farewell Card for Coworker — So Long Farewell A2 Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eWave goodbye to the departing coworker or boss you'll actually miss. This snarky send-off card says congratulations and also how dare you in the exact right proportion. 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This farewell card says you are dead to me with full love and complete sincerity. It's the most honest goodbye card you could send -- and the one they're going to keep on their new desk as a reminder of who they left behind.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCard Details\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSize: A2 (4.25\" x 5.5\")\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eInside: Blank\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes a complimentary kraft envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIncludes our world famous “Rip Open This Mofo” sticker\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShipped in a rigid mailer to keep your card pristine\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eShips USPS Ground Advantage — upgrade available at checkout\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"As Told By Ellie","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":41980054503498,"sku":"YAY012","price":5.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0549\/5871\/9050\/files\/AIfaves-2026-05-26T220857.756.jpg?v=1779851348"}],"url":"https:\/\/www.astoldbyellie.com\/collections\/cards-for-coworkers.oembed","provider":"As Told By Ellie","version":"1.0","type":"link"}